The Lord disciplines those he loves

2 persons or 1?
I feel like 2 persons rather than 1
the me by morning and the me by night
the me in public, and the me curled up under the sheets
somewhat like Dr Jeckel and Mr Hyde
Each person a total extreme from the other
yet yesterday night, it seems like Mr Hyde has dissapeared
and now there is just me, just as i am.
Yet my soul seems at peace.
My mind does not believe it,
yet my heart knows it.
the wonders of solitude and prayer.
or perhaps i know now the purpose of this
and the title says it best,
The Lord wants to discipline me.


"My son do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons.
For what son is not disciplined by his father?
If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline),
then you are illegitimate children and not true sons.
Moreover, we have all had human fathers who discipline us and we respected them for it.
How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live!
Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best;
but God discplines us for out good,
that we may share in his holiness.
No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however,
it produces a harvest of rightheouness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
hebrews 12:5-11